Total Eclipse Of The Heart
by stardust2002
Summary: What if season 3 begins a little differently than we all think? Spoilers for seasons 1,2 and 3. Pairings: LD,LK,KA. Yes, it's confusing, it's supposed to be. FINALLY COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

Total Eclipse of the Heart

This was supposed to be a one-shot but I fear it will end up a little too long, so I'm splitting it up into two. I love using song titles for my stories so I've done it again here. The words (if you know them) fit really well for this story.

**oooooooooooooooooooo**

_... once upon a time I was falling in love, now I'm only falling apart ..._

She stepped off the raptor and oddly enough, felt like she was setting foot on solid ground for the first time in months, despite the fact that she'd been living on New Caprica for over half a year.

She looked around, taking in her surroundings and feeling like she was home, despite the fact that she'd only spent a few days here, nearly a year previously. It had been a disastrous time but it hadn't been _her _fault - Adama should never have chosen a frakking engineer to command, though she understood his reasons for doing so - and Cain had her people so terrified they wouldn't even take a pee without asking permission first. Then Lee had shown up and she thought things would get better, but they'd gotten worse if anything. Not really surprising though, considering the rift that had grown between them. At least they'd put things right after that experience - for a while anyway - and Adama had come to his senses and done what he should have done in the beginning, put Lee in command of the beast.

All this went through her mind in the blink of an eye as she grabbed the backpack handed to her by the ECO and began to walk through the hangar bay. A 'greeting committee' came to meet her and the others transferring back to active duty - a Lieutenant she'd never seen before and two marines.

"This way to junior officers quarters," the Lieutenant said matter-of-factly.

"I _was _a Captain before I left," Kara hissed under her breath, making the other two pilots chuckle. She recognized both of them - one she'd trained on Pegasus during her brief stay here, the other a new recruit who'd signed on just before she'd gone planetside. Neither of them she knew well, but she intended to get both of them on her side if she could - the beast was notorious for being an unfriendly environment, and she had no idea how Lee was going to react to having her under his command again, considering the way things had been left between them.

She'd hoped to rejoin Galactica's crew but Pegasus had been in greater need of people. Not that it really mattered; most of her friends were either dead or staying planetside, and the old man - the only reason for her to go there - would likely welcome her about as much as Lee would. He'd been awfully upset at the decision she'd made to leave and she wasn't sure if he'd forgiven her yet. Which is why she'd come aboard anonymously, just checking with crew members recruiting for the battlestars instead of talking with their respective commanding officers, despite having known them so well.

"You'll bunk here," the LIeutenant said, opening a hatch and motioning them in. It was a typical bunkroom - space for twelve, but it seemed there were only four empty spaces.

"The CAG will see you at 0700hrs in the ready room to discuss your flight status. In the meanwhile, the mess hall is still open for another hour, one deck down. Please remain out of sensitive areas till you have clearance."

The moment the hatch shut, Kara slammed her backpack down on an empty bunk. "He talks like we know nothing of life on a battlestar. Come on, I've been serving since he was probably in grade school. Do you think he even shaves yet?"

The others sniggered. The hatch opened again suddenly and the Lieutenant poked his head in with a puzzled look on his face.

"Aren't you ...?" he began, staring at Kara. "You're Starbuck aren't you?" There was definite awe in his voice.

"Come off it, do you really think I'd be _here _if I was?" she replied saucily.

"I could swear though ... I mean, you look ..."

"I think _I _should know who I am, don't you?" she said testily.

He straightened and resumed the professional mask. "Good day then," and he retreated, shutting the hatch behind him.

"You _are _Starbuck though," one of the others argued. He'd been dubbed Jellybean, as he had a huge stockpile of them from before the first attacks.

She turned an exasperated face on him. "Of _course _I am." Then she smiled. "I just like playing with people."

"Yeah, I remember," the other one said, a knowing smile on his face.

Kara's forehead wrinkled. "Yeah, but I barely knew you."

I've heard rumours ... you're quite infamous on Galactica you know."

"Strange, I seem to be infamous everywhere I go."

"Everyone always talked about 'Apollo and Starbuck' and what a great team you were."

Kara's face hardened and her shoulders tensed. "Not anymore. There is no Apollo and Starbuck now."

The kid whose callsign was Scruffy (because of his unkempt hair) looked at her curiously. "Sorry, was Apollo killed in the attack?"

"You don't know?" She looked at him incredulously.

"I was only on Galactica a few weeks before the President's decree that we had to settle on the planet," he said defensively.

"Apollo is the Admiral's son, Lee Adama. He's Commander of the ship you're standing on."

"Oh," he said, an embarrassed flush rising to his cheeks. "I guess he doesn't fly anymore then."

"No he doesn't," she replied in a cold voice. "More's the pity. He was a fantastic pilot."

The others seemed to take the hint and dropped the subject, suggesting instead that they go for dinner. It was an uneventful time, and they didn't see anyone they knew, for which Kara was grateful. She knew eventually she'd have to face Lee but she really wasn't ready for it yet - she was still too emotionally fragile after what had happened on the planet, and Lee's words were always sharp and cutting, like a knife piercing through her soul.

Once the transfer papers were seen by him or his XO Dualla, her name was sure to spark a reaction and he'd likely seek her out, wondering why she'd come back. She wasn't ready to tell him the truth yet. Wasn't sure if she ever would be either. So avoiding him was good. It was her standard tactic when trying not to deal with someone or something she was uncomfortable with.

The rest of the evening was uneventful as well. She met half the pilots she was bunking with and they sat around the table in their quarters, playing a game of triad which Kara won handily. _Lucky at cards, unlucky at love. _She gritted her teeth. She'd heard that expression too many times to count and though as a young girl she'd laughed it off, she now realized how true it was for her. _Shut up_, she told her subconscious. _Just shut up. Who needs love anyway?_

She carefully hid the spoils she'd won, not knowing if the others were trustworthy, and stripped, climbing into bed in her underwear. She didn't bother visiting the head in case she ran into someone familiar. So far she'd gotten awfully lucky. She wished she had a good bottle of ambrosia and a few willing participants to continue playing cards, but as she had to be up and presentable before 0700 she knew she needed to retire to bed now. Being late and hungover on the first day really wouldn't be a good way to start life over. _Lee would probably throw my ass in hack for a year, _she thought ruefully, then deliberately pushed him out of her mind. She forced herself to imagine flying a viper so as to keep her mind from wandering into areas she didn't want to go. Eventually her eyelids grew heavy and the distinction between wakefulness and sleep was lost.

_Her body was hot and sweaty, as was his, since they'd played pyramid for over an hour. The game was much harder one-on-one and Kara's knee ached horribly but there was no way she was going to lose after bragging about how good she was._

_They stood, appraising one another for a moment as they both panted and wiped the sweat from their brows._

_"You're pretty damn good," Sam conceded finally, a smile lurking in his frank blue eyes._

_"Maybe next time you'll believe me when I tell you I'm good," she said, a cocky grin on her face._

_Sam moved closer and the tension she'd felt between them all through the game heightened. So she hadn't been imagining it._

_"What else are you good at?" he asked, in a low, husky voice._

_"Wouldn't you like to know," she taunted, knowing exactly where he was going with this, both wanting it and being afraid of it at the same time._

_"I would, that's why I asked." He moved closer still and lay two fingers on her shoulder lightly, pulling her tank to the side and wiping the beads of sweat that had formed there._

_She stood, as if frozen, tongue-tied like an inexperienced teenager._

_"Maybe you can show me what you're good at," he whispered, moving his head down to kiss her lips gently._

Lee wouldn't have had to bend down, _she thought suddenly. _He's the perfect height for me. _Then she remembered exactly why she'd taken on this crazy-ass, no-chance-of-survival mission - she had to get away from Lee. So she opened her mouth seductively and kissed him with everything she had. Soon hands were raking over each other's glistening bodies, a minimal amount of clothing left on for propriety since they were still in public territory. _

_"You are good at this," he mumbled, lips never leaving hers._

_"You ain't seen nothin' yet ..."_

**ooooooooooooooooooooooooo**

She woke with a start to the alarm clanging loudly and the others rolling out of their bunks moaning. Her eyes felt sticky and refused to open, so she swiped at them with the back of her hand, wiping away the hardened residue of the tears she'd shed during the night. Her dream suddenly came back to her and tears pricked at her eyes again.

She shoved it out of her mind with an effort - she had more important things to concentrate on now. She had just under thirty minutes to be showered, dressed and ready for her meeting. And seven other people were doing the same, all struggling for room to get ready. She was bound and determined to show up there bright-eyed and bush-tailed, ready to show the CAG she was still in top form and didn't deserve to be treated like a nugget.

She made it with five minutes to spare and took a seat in the middle of the room. She didn't want to appear too eager, nor did she want to sit in the 'shit disturbers' territory in the back. Her sometimes warped sense of humour was something she couldn't do much about, but she had no desire to go back to her previous life of forever being yelled at and thrown in hack. She just wanted to fly. That's all. It was the one thing she could do without screwing up and the one thing that always gave her satisfaction. People couldn't be counted on for that.

"Commander on deck," one of the pilots yelled, spotting Lee walking in from the back of the room.

_Shit! Not already, _she thought, standing with the rest of them and plastering a look of nonchalance on her face. She'd had plenty of practice doing that.

Lee strode to the front of the room. "At ease." His eyes raked across the sea of flightsuits, taking in the mostly familiar faces. He'd been given the report earlier this morning that had said a few new recruits had come up from the planet, wanting to rejoin the military they'd left behind, but he hadn't had time to read it yet. Since he was dropping by the morning briefing anyway to talk with his CAG, he figured he'd meet them in person.

One set of eyes drew his like a magnet. Hazel-gree, wide, questioning. Her familiar blonde hair was pulled back in a severe ponytail and she was looking coherent and well put together.

"Starbuck," he said, in a flat, unemotional voice, though inside he felt like a million butterflies had been let loose in his stomach. "Glad you could join us. What brings you here?"

She nodded in lieu of a salute. Her stomach was churning like she had the Libran flu, but she kept her voice even and deferential. No point in making a scene already. "I'm here to join the fleet sir. If you'll have me."

Lee considered her statement, wondering if the undercurrent he felt in it was really there or just his imagination. "We need every pilot we've got, Captain."

The CAG had walked in during their exchange and looked at Kara in appreciation. "We have a Captain as a new recruit?" he asked Lee enthusiastically.

"Yes we do. She was the best pilot on Galactica before leaving us to join the settlers on the planet." Kara's cheeks burned as Lee continued to stare at her. "She's also one of the best flight instructors around, so you can promote her immediately to senior flight instructor and put Whiskers back in a raptor where he belongs. No need for an appraisal run."

The CAG, callsign Hopper as it turned out, stared wide-eyed at Kara as well. She flushed a deeper shade of red.

"Yes sir," he said, a note of doubt in his voice.

"You have a problem with that Captain?" Lee asked, turning to face him finally.

"No sir, it's just ... not routine ..."

"I've flown with her before. Many times. I know what she's capable of."

"Of course sir," Hopper deferred.

"Good, continue on then." Lee threw Kara another pointed look and exited the ready room.

"So Captain, ..." Hopper began, addressing Kara. "What callsign shall we use when addressing you?"

"Starbuck sir," she answered quickly.

His eyes opened wide as saucers and there was a hush in the room as all eyes turned to her.

"Starbuck," Hopper whispered, almost under his breath, the word itself filled with awe. After a pause to collect himself he continued. "Well Starbuck, we need some serious work here, as our previous instructor had little experience. It seems you've got your work cut out for you."

"That's good sir," she put in. "I hate being bored."

The room erupted in laughter and Kara smiled along with them, though inside she didn't find it funny in the slightest. If anything, it was more of a relief. She wanted to keep busy, needed to, in order to purge her mind and heart of all the unwanted thoughts and feelings surging through her.

**ooooooooooooooooooooooo**

Kara's first day was definitely wearying. Hopper hadn't been kidding when he'd said they needed a lot of work. by the end of her day - fourteen hours altogether - she was bone weary and had little voice left. Nonetheless, they'd made some good progress and she hoped they'd be pleased with her. Hopper seemed to be - he smiled and smacked her on the back as she peeled back the top half of her flightsuit and grabbed her roster from the ready room.

"Good work today Starbuck. Go hit the showers and get something to eat."

"Thank you sir," she said wearily, hoping that was exactly what would happen with no interruptions. Then she had a very important date planned - with her bunk. 0700 was going to come way too soon.

She'd no sooner turned the corner to the last corridor when a voice stopped her.

"Starbuck."

She stopped and turned around. _Well, there goes a good plan down the drain, _she thought, meeting Lee's steely blue gaze.

"Can I have a word?" He motioned towards an open hatch.

"Of course sir," she said, wishing she could be anywhere else but here. Even back on the planet would be preferable ...

He stood at the door and shut the hatch behind her, closing them in alone together. His eyes bored holes in hers.

"Why are you here?" he asked without preamble.

"I don't know what you mean sir," she replied, colouring slightly.

"Cut the crap Kara and stop calling me 'sir'," he demanded. "Why are you here?"

"I should have thought that was obvious," she answered, eyebrow raising. She'd been practicing - wanting to use that on him for a change.

"You missed flying."

She sighed. "Yeah, I did," she admitted. "It's a lot different down there."

He looked around as if searching for someone, even though he was a s aware as she was that they were alone. "How'd you manage to convince Sam to come back up? I thought he hated spaceships."

"He does, and I didn't."

"You left him down there?" he asked incredulously.

"You could say that," she answered evasively, shoulders tensing up.

He eyed her narrowly, noticing for the first time that she was wearing both dogtags.

"Something wrong between you two?"

"It's over," she said simply, looking him full in the face.

"Really," was all he said, sounding smug. He looked down at her disdainfully. "Following the same old pattern again I see. Pick 'em up, frak 'em till you get bored then dump 'em."

The energy drained out of her suddenly. This was a conversation she _really _didn't want to be having with him right now.

"Yeah," she spat out bitterly. "That's what I do. No one's interesting enough for me to keep around long." Her eyes narrowed to mere slits.

"So why marry him then?" Lee exploded. "Why even bother making a commitment if you know you're just going to break it?"

She shrugged. "Just felt like it I suppose."

Lee's eyes narrowed as well and the glare he shot at her was like ice. "That's you all over Kara, selfish bitch who only cares about herself."

"Are we about done here?" she asked impatiently, crossing her arms over her chest and beginning to shiver as her sweaty tanks chilled her skin.

"You have someone else's bed to get to?" he sneered. "Wouldn't want to be late - maybe he'll find someone else to replace you."

She stepped back as if stung, eyes widening in shock. Her arms wrapped themselves tighter around her chest.

"Can I be dismissed now?" she asked in a small voice, face hardening into a mask of anger.

"Sure. Just don't let your 'personal' life get in the way of your duties, Captain." He spat the last word out like she was a distasteful piece of food.

She hurried out, not looking back and ran to the head. She stripped as the water ran from cold to hot, and stepped in, finally letting the tears fall. They burned her cheeks as the water ran down her face. She took much longer than her usual five minutes, hoping the hot water would wash away all the guilt and shame she felt.

**TBC**


	2. Chapter 2

Total Eclipse of the Heart - chapter 2

A/N: Well, it looks like it will be 3 chapters now - somehow this thing just keeps getting longer and longer! Hopefully I'll be able to stop at 3 - I need to get back to some of the other stories soon. :)

**oooooooooooooooooo**

The next few weeks went by in a blur for Kara. Every day was pretty much the same - she rose, ate, worked, showered, ate and then slept. There was time for the odd triad game, most of which she won, but otherwise free time was a thing of the past. She worked herself hard doing work she didn't have to do in order to keep herself busy, but Hopper didn't mind putting more responsibility on her shoulders. Less for him that way, and given their weak crew situation, he'd had more than his share of work for months.

She'd seen Lee exactly twice the entire two weeks; it seemed he was avoiding her as much as she was him. Although that hard and fast rule she'd decided upon about not going near him was a lot tougher to keep now that she was here, in an enclosed space with him. The first time they'd met - accidentally - had been a few days after their first encounter and Kara was still hurting.

_She'd walked around a corner and literally stumbled into him. She'd put her arms up to prevent herself from falling, but a pair of strong, well-defined arms grabbed hers and pulled her upright in one smooth move._

_"You should watch where you're going more carefully Captain," Lee said, no trace of humour in his tone. She looked up into his solemn face and felt a pang of disappointment. In the old days, he'd have said exactly the same thing, only he'd have been teasing and one thing would have led to another until they were both laughing themselves silly and everyone who passed by looked at them as though they were crazy. Now she had to bite back a nasty retort._

_"I'm sorry Commander. It won't happen again," she said meekly instead._

_He gave her a long stare before speaking again. "Does my father know you're back yet?"_

_"Not unless one of your crew mentioned it. I haven't told him."_

_"Good. Don't. You broke his heart by leaving. You'll break it again if he knows you came here instead of going back to _his _ship."_

_"Hey, that's not fair! I _wanted _to go to Galactica but I had no choice," she argued hotly. "You don't _really _think I want to be here with you, do you?"_

_Lee's jaw set. "I guess you're right. You've never wanted to be with me have you?"_

_"Are you still hung up on what happened that night between us?" she asked defiantly. She didn't have to mention exactly which night that was. They both remembered all too well._

_"It was never just 'that night' Kara, and you know it," he said angrily. "You were stringing me along for months - flirting with me, ignoring me, flirting with me again, fighting with me, telling me you wanted me, getting me naked and then throwing me off and telling me you were attracted to some other guy, and just using me as a replacement. You do whatever the hell you want to make yourself happy and don't care about the people you hurt in the process."_

_"Oh, like you've never hurt anyone before," she retorted sarcastically. "Gianne, Billy - remember him? the guy whose girlfriend you stole?"_

_"Don't you dare bring that up! It's not my fault Billy was killed. _You're _the one who killed my brother and nearly killed me as well."_

_Her face fell as all the colour drained away. "Too bad I didn't," she said, forcing the usual Starbuck sarcasm. "Then we wouldn't be having this conversation would we?"_

_Lee's jaw set harshly and his eyes glittered with anger. "You just stick to your job and I'll stick to mine and outside of that we stay away from each other."_

_Kara snorted. "Whatever happened to 'yeah, we're okay'?"_

_Lee walked forward a few steps till he was in her personal space. "We were okay a long time ago. Now, we're nothing."_

Gods, those words had stung. But if she was honest with herself, she'd deserved them. She'd thrown those very same words at him at a vulnerable point in his life and they'd obviously done a lot of damage, since his wounds still seemed raw and bleeding. It's just she hadn't expected them to come back _now, _nearly a year later. She'd expected him to lash out at her after she'd uttered them, and almost wished he had. The physical response of him touching her would have crumbled the walls she'd been trying hastily to erect that night, after realizing the mistake she'd almost made. One touch from him in anger would have fueled her desire to have him anyway, frak the consequences. And now things might be totally different had that been the case.

It was the _other _words he'd said that she dwelt the most on though - 'You broke my father's heart by leaving. You'll break it again if he knows you came here instead of going back to his ship.' Was he right? Was Adama angry with her for following her heart? That was what she'd always done and he'd indulged her for it even though others swore she needed severe discipline for her behaviour. Had he forgiven her for leaving? He'd always said he considered her a daughter, and parents had to learn to let go of their children and let them go their own ways didn't they? She didn't believe he would still be angry with her for falling in love and leaving to be with Sam.

Perhaps Lee was right about the other part though. She hadn't had a choice about which ship to be on, but maybe Adama didn't know that. And even though she hadn't contacted him herself, she knew only too well how the grapevine worked. After fifteen days, he had to have heard she was back. Maybe he would be angry with her for coming back and not contacting him to at least say hello.

As the days passed, she wanted more and more to see him, but she knew she couldn't. New recruits weren't allowed time off and her schedule had her working twelve-hour days most of the time. Her only hope was to wait till the old man came to the beast to visit Lee.

A more immediate problem was the fact that though she was getting eight hours of sleep a night, she was waking up feeling like she'd hardly slept. The dreams had begun plaguing her almost every night and she didn't know what to do to get rid of them. It had to stop though - it was like she was reliving her life with Sam. There was one in particular that was beginning to recur - it had been the beginning of the end between them.

_They'd been married three months and it had been good between them. Mainly anyway. Things were more tense than they'd been on the Old Caprica, and even Galactica, but Kara put it down to adjusting to life on a new planet with few resources and crappy weather._

_"What's the matter?" Sam asked, interrupting her daydreams._

_She turned her head to face him, struggling to bring things back into focus. "Nothing." _

_"Bullshit kara. Don't lie to me." She smiled - he had a way of being endearing even when chewing her out._

_"Nothing's wrong Sam. I'm fine."_

_He seemed to accept that and looked away, staring out the tent flap at the setting sun._

_"You're not happy here are you?" he asked quietly._

_"What do you mean? Of course I'm happy." She forced a smile._

_Sam turned to face her. "How can you be? You gave up everything you had to come down here." He sighed. "I've been watching you - you're not happy here. You're putting up with it but you want to go back."_

_Kara stood up angrily, hands on her hips. "Samuel T. Anders! I didn't go all the way back to Caprica to haul your ass here just to leave you!"_

_"I'm not suggesting you leave."_

_"Sounds an awful lot like it to me." Her voice quavered with the tears that were springing to her eyes._

_"Kara, I ... I didn't mean ..." he said apologetically, coming to stand before her._

_"I knew what I was doing when I came here. I knew what I'd be giving up and what sort of life I'd be in for. Yes, I miss flying but I was willing to give it up to be with you."_

_Sam took her in his arms, resting his chin on her hair. "I hope I can be worthy of that sacrifice."_

_"You are," she mumbled into his chest. "You are."_

Instead of crawling into her bunk, Kara pulled on a sweatshirt and pants and headed back to the ready room. If she lay in bed now, sleep wouldn't come and she'd just think about him - something she wanted desperately to avoid.

She laid her hand on the handle, intending to push the hatch the rest of the way open when she heard whispers. The room was dark but obviously there was someone in there. More than one person. And from the sound of things, she could tell exactly what they were doing.

She pushed the hatch open slightly and slid inside, intending on ribbing whoever it was heartily for frakking in such a public place. Her jaw dropped in amazement.

It was Lee. And Dee.

They were definitely frakking and from the sheen of sweat on their bodies that she could just make out in the emergency lighting, they'd been at it for a while. She stepped out and stood beside the door, hoping they'd finish soon so she could go in and grab her paperwork. She began to feel her stomach churn as she heard panting and moaning. When all fell silent for a few minutes, she dared venture in again, standing in the shadows by the door.

"We'd best get dressed and go," Lee said quietly.

The lights suddenly flicked on and Lee and Dee both turned, wide-eyed, to see Kara with her hand on the switch, a big grin on her face.

"You guys should get a room for that you know," she said, then appeared to think of something startling. "Oh, that's right. You're the Commander and XO of this ship. You _have _your own quarters. They not good enough, or do you like doing it dangerously? You _want _people to find you in such a compromising position?"

Lee stood between the two women, holding his pants up in front of his lower half while Dee dressed behind him. Kara only caught a quick glimpse but she could swear the dark-skinned woman was actually blushing. Lee turned to face her a minute later.

"Go on. I'll meet you at my quarters later." His voice grew harsh. "I have something else to do first."

Dee took her leave quickly, not meeting Kara's eyes. Lee turned back to face her, deliberately dressing slowly so she could see every part of him. And look she did.

"You've gained a little weight eh?" she taunted. "If you think you're going to stay as buff as you used to be just by having sex, you're mistaken."

"I see you've tried," he threw back cuttingly. "I guess it's working for you, you're skin and bones."

She exhaled loudly. "Yeah, because I've been getting _so _much sex lately," she said sarcastically.

"You jealous?"

She snorted with laughter. "Of Dee? I wouldn't touch you with a ten foot pole. You're used goods now." His face darkened with anger as she spoke. "First the prostitute on Cloud Nine, then stealing someone else's woman ... who else has there been that I don't know about?"

Lee grabbed her arms and pinned her against the wall before she was aware of what was happening.

"I told you not to talk about that," he growled menacingly, releasing her, but still standing close enough to pin her in.

"Sounds like someone's got a guilty conscience to me," she said, a challenge in her voice.

"_I'm _not that one who has reason to feel guilty," he said quietly. "I wonder how poor Samuel must feel, waiting months for you to come back to him only to have you dump him."

She froze, unwanted images burning through her mind.

_She trudged wearily back to her tent, lantern in hand. Roslin had seen potential in Kara that she'd never known she possessed and had recruited her to help out at the school. Kara had never thought she'd like working with kids, but her love of art, dormant for so long, flowed through her like a stream and she'd thoroughly enjoyed every moment of the classes. Roslin had asked her to take part in some of the other artistic subjects - music, literature, writing - and Kara had agreed. They'd met this evening at the school to work out the next few lessons and fortunately had ended early._

_As Kara pulled back the flap of her tent, she was surprised to see someone in bed; it was early yet. Someone with red hair - long red hair. Someone Kara recognized in an instant - Jean Barolay, a former C-buck and Sam's right hand man, so to speak, in the resistance._

_At first Kara's tired brain didn't seem to connect, then she realized Jean was naked, at least from the waist up. Kara's brow crinkled in confusion. Why was she naked in their bed? Was something wrong with hers? Then it hit Kara like a ton of bricks as she heard a moan of pleasure and Sam's deep voice whispering her name. Everything came into focus suddenly and it was crystal clear. Jean's body began to move up and down faster and she heard Sam's breathy whispers turn to moans. Her blood froze - this was not supposed to be happening._

_"Samuel!" she barked out angrily. The two bodies on the bed stopped suddenly and Sam lifted himself up to his elbows, a look of horror on his face. _

_"What the hell do you think you're doing?" she demanded in a low, charged voice._

_Jean had the decency to roll off him, but wrapped herself in the blanket, leaving Sam naked to the world._

_"Kara," he began, a contrite 'little boy caught doing something he shouldn't be' look on his face._

_She held up a hand. "Don't bother," she said coldly. "Stay," she spat out at Jean, who was grabbing her clothes and edging towards the flap at the other end of the tent. "Place is all yours now."_

She slapped him, hard.

This time he slapped back, just as hard.

Kara's face paled and her eyes went glassy. The mark his hand had made on her cheek stood out brightly against the whiteness of her skin. Her body went limp and she slid down to the floor as Lee backed away in horror. As she sat in a crumpled heap on the floor, staring at nothing, Lee realized he'd gone too far, yet again. He'd hit her once before and it had driven her away from him, into another man's arms. He was then stuck with the consolation prize - any woman who was willing, and preferably didn't cost money. It suddenly struck him like a bolt of lightning that the reason his life had been the miserable, pathetic existence it had been for the better part of a year and a half wasn't _because_ of her, it was because of what _he'd_ done to her. He'd made her what she was now. The last thing he wanted was to drive her away again, now that she was back in his life. He'd been acting like he didn't want her around, treating her like garbage, but that was just him reverting back to old behaviours with her - except back then she'd have played along and trashed him right back, and it would all have been good. Now it was anything but.

"Kara, I'm so sorry," he said sadly, knowing after the last time that an apology was necessary right away.

"Leave me alone, " she whispered, eyes unmoving.

"Please, let me help you," he offered, holding out his hand to help her up, but she plastered herself tighter against the wall.

"Leave me alone," she repeated in a louder voice.

Lee leaned forward and tried to grab her hand anyway.

"Leave me alone!" she screamed, clawing at the wall to get up and scurrying to the door.

"Kara, please, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have ..." But by then she was so far down the hall she couldn't hear the rest of his apology.

She ran straight to the head and threw up in the toilet several times, then she washed her clammy face with cold water and headed back to the bunkroom. Thankfully the main lights were out and only one reading light was on - no one would see the marks Lee had made.

"You still up?" the one lone pilot still awake asked her as she shut the hatch.

"Working late," she said, trying to make her voice sound nonchalant. She wasn't sure she succeeded, but he didn't seem to notice anything amiss.

"So what's new?" he chuckled sarcastically. "Do you ever do anything other than work?"

"Doesn't seem like it," she whispered.

"G'night Starbuck."

"Night." She buried her face in her pillow and curled into the fetal position, silent tears coursing down her cheeks.

**TBC**


	3. Chapter 3

Total Eclipse of the Heart - chapter 3

Yes, I've done it again. The story is finished, but this last chapter was way too long so I've split it into two. The next chapter will be the last. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed for reading and letting me know whether or not you've enjoyed it. :)

**oooooooooooooooooooooooooo**

From that moment on, she'd thrown herself into work whole-heartedly, never taking time for anything else. She needed to make sure she was so exhausted that she fell into bed every night, asleep almost before she hit the pillow. It was only then that she didn't have the time to think about him. Or him. Two people she'd loved and been betrayed by. Just thinking about them made her eyes sting with tears. She wasn't normally a cryer but her emotions were bubbling close to the surface now, stronger than they'd ever been before, like a dam about to burst from the pressure. She wasn't sure how much longer she would be able to hold it together.

Then one day good news came. The Admiral was coming for a visit. Kara couldn't wait to talk to him, although a part of her still feared he would be angry with her. She tried to ignore it though; her need to see him was too great. She missed the familiar faces and friends of Galactica - Adama, Helo ... and yes, even Lee. He was here but he wasn't - his body was here but the man she'd teased about being 'the worst CAG in the history of CAG's', the man who'd held her and kissed her for the first time when she returned from Caprica - he was gone. And Kara missed him terribly.

**ooooooooooooooooooooooooooo**

Lee greeted his father warmly as he arrived in the Pegasus hangar bay. Despite being the more advanced of the two ships, it had taken a backseat to Galactica, the flagship of the fleet. It was rare for the Admiral to come here - Lee was usually summoned there.

"It's good to see you son. How are things going?" Adama asked as they walked side by side to Lee's quarters.

"Good, mostly." Lee smiled reassuringly but Adama was sharp. Perhaps too sharp - he always caught the things that weren't said.

"So, there's a problem?" he asked, accepting the glass of water offered to him.

"It's nothing, really," Lee said, sinking down on the couch beside him. "Everything's going smoothly."

"But ..." Adama prodded, knowing he'd have to extract what Lee was hiding. From the time he was a young boy, Lee had always held things close to his chest, never letting them out unless forced to.

"But ..." Lee sighed. "There's Starbuck."

"Hmmm." The sound was pregnant with meaning.

Lee looked sharply at him. "You knew she was here." It was a statement, not a question.

"I'd heard."

Lee took a deep breath and counted to ten. Sometimes his father's lack of openness frustrated him to no end.

"Things are ... difficult with her."

"When aren't they?"

Lee stared at his father. Had he just made a joke? Yes, it seemed he had. There was a small smile forming on his face and his eyes twinkled.

"She's a tough one to handle. I wondered how you'd manage it."

"And you didn't step in and give me advice on what to do with her?"

"A good leader has to learn how to deal with the difficult people too. It's not all 'yes sir, no sir' when you're in charge."

"That's not really the problem," Lee admitted. "I've promoted her to flight instructor - she's the best pilot we've got - naturally, and in just over two weeks has pretty much sewn up the job of assistant CAG. If I wasn't afraid Hopper would be offended, I'd promote her to CAG already."

Adama's eyebrows lifted. "After months away from duty?"

"You should see her - she's really changed. Doesn't pull crazy-ass stunts anymore, and is a respected leader around here. Of course it helps that the name Starbuck is pretty much legendary."

"There must be something wrong."

"Why do you say that?"

"For her to change so drastically? There has to be something bothering her."

Lee stared at his glass uncomfortably. Adama watched him, knowing there was more.

"So if she's behaving professionally like a model soldier, where's the problem?"

"It's personal."

"I see." Adama was dying to ask but he knew Lee would never tell him, even under threat of cylon torture. His personal life, especially when it involved Kara, was intensely personal. He shared it with no one. He liked to think that if he saw Kara and talked to her about it that she'd spill the beans, but he knew her well enough to know she was a closed book as well. Maybe that's why their relationship had been so stormy - neither of them had the ability to open up to the other, and misunderstandings always arose.

Still, if she'd changed as much as Lee thought she had, perhaps it was worth talking to her. He desperately wanted to see her anyway - she was his daughter, at least in his mind she was, even if no one else understood.

"I'll go say hello when we're done here," he said evenly, and Lee just nodded, happy to drop the conversation before his father started prying.

**oooooooooooooooooooooooo**

He stood in the shadows watching her. She _had _changed as much as Lee said and now he was even more curious as to why.

She gave orders subtly and encouraged rather than yelled, something he'd tried to teach her for years but she just never seemed to grasp. He could see she had the other pilots' respect and she behaved as someone worthy of the responsibility of being in charge, not a spoiled teenager who fought when things didn't go her way. If he wasn't so worried about why she'd changed so drastically, he'd have been immensely proud of her.

"Mornin' Starbuck whaddaya hear?" he said, walking up behind her.

She spun round quickly, a look of intense joy on her face.

"Admiral, sir," she said, too tongue-tied to give him the proper response to their old daily banter. Her grin was so wide it nearly split her face.

Adama lifted a hand and traced her cheek delicately, then pulled her into a big bear hug.

The unexpected gesture made her eyes sting. She threw her arms around him, heart feeling suddenly lighter. She hadn't realized jsut how frightened she'd been that he too would reject her.

"It's good to see you," he said in a gravelly voice, obviously struggling to keep control of his emotions.

"You too," she whispered.

They broke apart and Adama appraised her. She'd changed physically as well.

"Do you think you can find time to humour an old man and sit and chat with him?"

She opened her mouth to answer that she was still on duty but Hopper beat her to it.

"Go ahead Starbuck. I'll take care of things here."

Her eyes stung again at his generous offer. It was beginning to become a habit, it seemed.

"You're sure?"

"You've put in far more time than you've needed to over the past few weeks. Consider yourself off-duty and go have some fun." He smiled at her and she returned it gratefully.

"Looks like I might have a few minutes to squeeze you in," she teased, taking the Admiral's arm and walking with him.

Kara led him to an empty briefing room, knowing there were always people in the bunkroom. She didn't want to share him - selfish she knew, but Adama was family to her, and they had a lot of catching up to do. Mostly they talked military stuff - how things were going now, what had happened while she was gone ... It was all very routine but it served to help Kara feel like she was still a part of things.

Eventually they fell into a comfortable silence and Adama put forth the question Kara wasn't answering.

"How was life on New Caprica?"

A shadow of sadness crossed her face before she smiled once again and answered.

"Definitely different," she admitted. "It was pretty bleak at times, what with trying to make do with as little as possible and the terrible weather." She gave a little laugh. "But you know what they say - whatever doesn't kill you only makes you stronger."

"I've heard that," he answered, a matching smile on his face. "How's Samuel doing?" he asked, after a pause. He'd heard she'd come back to the fleet - without him. And it made him wonder. Kara was the kind of person who threw herself heart and soul into whatever she did, and he'd seen first hand how much she cared for him by her insistence on rescuing him, and by her actions once she had. Though he had wondered at the time if love was enough to separate Kara from her destiny. It seemed not.

"He's fine," she said curtly, a note of bitterness creeping into her voice.

Adama caught it, and noticed her close off suddenly, a mask suddenly appearing over her previously open and confiding face. He'd seen it before and it always meant she was hiding something.

"He didn't come back with you?"

"He had better things to do," she bit out.

Adama watched as the mask she'd been trying to keep up slipped and the woman underneath was revealed. The tears pooled in her eyes as she lost the grip she'd had on her emotions.

"He doesn't want me anymore," she broke out suddenly, then burst into tears. Adama moved towards her and gathered her into his strong arms.

_She stood at the edge of the settlement, staring out over the open fields by the river, arms firmly crossed over her chest. She felt more than saw a presence appear beside her. There was no mistaking who it was - only he had the ability to make her feel the way she did now._

_"We need to talk," he said softly._

_"I'm not really sure there's much to talk about," she replied just as softly, proud of herself for keeping her voice even and unemotional._

_"Kara, I'm sorry you found out the way you did."_

_She turned to face him. "There's a better way to find out your husband is cheating on you?' she asked sarcastically._

_"It's not cheating exactly ..."_

_"You're married to me but sleeping with another woman. How is that not cheating?" she interrupted, anger taking hold now. In the twenty-four hours since she'd caught them she'd swayed like a pendulum, emotions going back and forth from anger to hurt._

_"Kara you have to understand ..."_

_"Do I? Do you really have to explain it for me? Because if you think you do, then obviously you're not giving me enough credit. I'm not _that _stupid." Her eyes narrowed and she turned away to stare at the dying sun. It was less painful than looking at him._

_"You should have come back sooner."_

_She swung round to face him angrily. "Now you're making this my fault?"_

_"In a way it is," he said, blue eyes flashing darkly. "You promised me - promised you'd come back."_

_"And I did!"_

_"You said it took you two days to get to Caprica. Two days to get home, a few more to put together a rescue party, two to come back. A week - ten days tops. _You were gone three months Kara, three months!" _He stopped and took a deep breath. "I fell so hard for you - I can't even begin to understand what it was you did to me but I was full of hope when you left, knowing you'd be back soon and we'd be together again." His eyes narrowed. "And then you never came. I waited and waited Kara, but every day I had to give up just a little more. I wanted to believe you were trying, that maybe you'd been killed and couldn't return but there was this little voice in my head that just kept telling me you couldn't be bothered. That what we had meant nothing to you and you weren't willing to risk your life again."_

_"How can you say that?" she demanded, tears pricking in her eyes. "I thought of you all the time! I wanted to come back right away but I couldn't - we were stuck in crisis after crisis and I couldn't just take a bunch of people and leave."_

_"I didn't know that though, did I?" he asked quietly. "All I knew is that you made a promise, and when push came to shove, I realized I didn't know you well enough to know if you meant to keep it."_

_"So you began sleeping with her," she said bitterly._

_"Jean was there, and well ... I can't really explain what happened. She'd changed - she was different somehow. More like you than I'd ever noticed before. And suddenly it occurred to me that everything I wanted was right there with me, and I'd been too blind to see it."_

_"So why didn't you just tell me all this when I came back for you? Why pretend you still cared for me? Why marry me and then have the truth come out?"_

_"I still loved you. I was so happy to see you and I wanted it to work out between us."_

_Kara wiped the tears that were escaping down her cheek with the back of her hand. "How do you suppose Jean felt when you suddenly dumped her because I was back?"_

_"I ah ... I ..." he began, flushing madly._

_She glanced over at him as he stuttered. It wasn't like Sam - he was normally a very confident person. The truth pierced her suddenly and her eyes widened in shock._

_"You didn't did you? You've been sleeping with her the whole time! Four months we've been married and you've been cheating on me the whole time!" Now the tears broke free and she let them fall._

_"Kara, please ..."_

_"Don't bother. I don't wanna know, I just don't wanna know." She turned her back on him and let the tears fall unchecked, feeling her heart cracking into little pieces. Yet again._

_He waited a few moments then put a hand on her shoulder. "Can't we work this out?"_

_She shrugged him off and turned to face him. "I'm going back."_

_"Back?" He shook his head in confusion._

_"Back to the fleet. That's where I belong. I only came here to be with you."_

_"Stay?" he begged. "I still love you."_

_"Yeah, and I still love you. But you've already found someone to replace me."_

_"Kara, I ..." he began, but she was already walking._

_"Goodbye Samuel," she said softly, not turning around. "Have a nice life."_

She told her story in bits and pieces between sobs, not going into all the details, but telling him enough to understand the gist of it. He squeezed her tighter and rested his face in her hair as she sobbed on his shoulder.

"Oh Kara," he whispered.

Normally she would have punched anyone who dared have pity on her - except maybe the Admiral - but now she was hurting too much and needing comfort. Her heart responded with gratitude as she felt the love flow from him - the unconditional love a father has for his child who's hurting. It was what she needed most right now.

Lee stood outside the doorway, face white with shock. He'd been passing by when he'd heard his father's voice and had stopped, curious as to what he was doing in an empty briefing room. Then he'd caught Kara's voice and prepared to move on, not wanting to eavesdrop. But she'd burst into tears suddenly and he was rooted to the spot. Kara never cried. _Never. _He wanted to leave but at the same time needed to stay to know what was so terrible that she would actually break down.

Lee felt like an ass. His cheeks flushed hotly as their last few encounters came back to him, and he realized how horrible the things he'd said to her must have felt. He'd jumped to conclusions with her, again, and again had been wrong. _Gods, why am I so stupid? _he berated himself. _Why can't I just keep my big mouth shut? _But the answer to that came quickly. _Because you feel a need with her - a need to win, to conquer her. And she's impossible to beat, though you just keep right on trying. _A wisp of an idea formed in his head suddenly - maybe he should offer her love and understanding instead of contempt and arrogance. _And jealousy, _his subconscious reminded him. _No matter how much you want to deny it , you want her. Always have, and she's continually pissed you off by choosing other men instead of you. _But the other little voice in his ear spoke up. _That's because you've always tried to dominate, and no one dominates Starbuck. The only other men who've had her were successful because they accepted her for who she was, and treated her as an equal._

His cheeks burned and he forced his feet to move before they left and caught him standing there. He was determined to confront her and apologize. And then maybe, if she was willing to forgive, they could start over.

**TBC**


	4. Chapter 4 THE END!

Total Eclipse of the Heart - chapter 4 (the final)

Days went by, then a week, but still he couldn't get her alone to talk. He could have pulled rank and ordered her into a meeting, but he knew that would put her in the wrong frame of mind. It needed to be a coincidental meeting - she wouldn't be defensive then, and perhaps he could find a way to crack through her walls. He'd always assumed they were impenetrable, as on the outside she seemed as though nothing could hurt her. But he knew now that they could be breached - she'd cried in front of his father. And he himself had seen the wall nearly come down the last time he'd been alone with her. He needed another chance but fate didn't seem to be working in his favour this time.

A more pressing problem however, was Dee. She'd noticed his aloofness and had confronted him on it.

"Is something wrong?" she asked, the same hurt look crossing her face now as each of the last times he'd turned her advances down. "Did I do something to upset you?"

"No," he answered quickly, trying to force a smile.

"Are you sure? Because if there's something I'm doing ..."

"It's not you." The words came out suddenly, before he'd prepared himself to say them. The hurt look on her face and in her bright green eyes intensified as his words came out more abrupt than she'd expected them to be. She wrapped the sheet around her naked torso.

"Then what is it?" When he didn't answer she continued on. "If you tell me, maybe I can help."

_Not a chance, _he thought with an inward chuckle. _No one can help me with this problem. Hell, I'm not even sure if I can help myself! _But sharing his inwardly sarcastic thoughts with her really wasn't going to help either of them.

Dee seemed to sense his reluctance to talk about whatever was bothering him so she tried another tack. "Come to bed Lee, relax a little. Worries never seem so bad once you relax and let your mind wander."

Normally Lee would have agreed with her, and spending some time indulging physical pleasures had often helped ease his mental burdens. But letting his mind wander now would be horribly dangerous. He was barely able to drag his mind away from Kara long enough to do his necessary work - letting his mind wander while making love to Dee was just asking for trouble.

Besides, he just wasn't in the mood. Didn't think he'd be able to get it up even if he tried.

"Don't worry. You just lay back and relax and I'll do everything."

Too lost in thought to protest, he allowed himself to be undressed and laid on the bed. True to her word, Dee did everything, and to Lee's surprise, he was actually able to function. Of course he had his eyes closed for most of it and his thoughts kept coming back to Kara, but he kept his mouth firmly clamped shut. He wasn't normally a very vocal person in bed, but he had on occasion called out Dee's name softly during their climaxes. He really didn't want to make the mistake of calling Kara's name by accident. _That _was an unforgivable sin.

All of a sudden it clicked for him as Dee lay panting in his arms. The reason Baltar couldn't keep his eyes off Kara before Colonial Day, then seemed to hate her afterwards, _after _getting her into his bed. The reason Baltar laid into him at the card game the next day, like it was some sort of competition between the two men. And why Kara had been so pissed at him that morning when he'd teased her about getting laid. _She wanted _me_ - she called out _my _name when she was with him. And then I laid into her about being an irresponsible floozy who couldn't keep her pants up - my gods, no wonder she hated me and flew straight into Anders' arms! It was all my fault!_

He wriggled uncomfortably at the thought, feeling the flush on his neck and face deepen. Dee took it as a sign that he wanted more, but he pushed her off, perhaps a little roughly, and began to dress.

She shrank back and pulled the sheet up around her again, the hurt look back on her face.

Lee turned to face her and thought he kept his face steady, inside he felt the weight on his heart grow. _Seems flying a viper isn't the only thing you're good at, _he told himself. _Hurting people, especially women you care about, seems to be your specialty. _

He sighed. "I'm not mad at you Dee, there's just something I have to do. It's driving me crazy."

"Uh huh," she murmured, knowing it was about Kara. It _always _was, when it caused him grief like this. Shed known from the moment she'd found out Kara had joined the Pegasus crew that it would spell trouble for Lee. It always did.

"I'll be back in a while."

Dee just nodded, the sadness never leaving her eyes.

**ooooooooooooooooooooo**

Lee strode the corridors, wondering how he was going to get Kara alone to talk to her. If he made it professional, she'd bristle up like a porcupine. If he made it personal, she'd probably just clam up.

He must have been walking for twenty minutes when he realized his feet had automatically taken him to the pilot's ready room - a place that should be deserted at this hour.

He pushed open the hatch quietly to find the lights dimmed and one lone figure at the table, blonde head bent over in concentration. He watched her for a minute before approaching, wanting to know what sort of mood she was in. He knew from hard experience that confronting Kara was often like dealing with a wild animal - you had to know which approach to take or she'd turn the tables on the situation and take control.

She was relaxed - no sign of tension in her back or shoulders, and her body was still, save for the movement of her arm as she wrote out reports.

"Kara," he said softly. She turned abruptly, eyes widening with ... surprise, shock, fear ...? He couldn't quite tell. "Can we talk?" He kept his voice low, hoping not to scare her.

She stood and involuntarily moved to the other side of the table. She didn't say a word and Lee was tempted to just turn tail and run, but he'd tried that with her before and it had never worked. But then again, she'd tried it on him as well and he'd always just let her go, which had also gotten them nowhere. It was time to make a stand, deal with the issues and get it all out in the open, regardless of how painful it would be. _Couldn't possibly be any more painful than our confrontations already are, _the little voice in his head told him.

"I'm sorry."

Kara cocked a disbelieving eyebrow at him. Lee Adama? Apologizing? That was virtually unheard of.

"What for?"

Lee's cheeks flamed. "I uh ... overheard some of your conversation with my father earlier, and I'm sorry ... about the things I said to you."

"Are you sorry about listening in on our conversation or about what you heard?" she asked sarcastically, a trace of bitterness creeping into her voice.

"Both I suppose," he answered uncomfortably. "Why didn't you tell me the truth about Samuel?"

Anger flashed across her face. "Why didn't you _ask _me instead of assuming the worst?"

"You could have been honest with me and told me I was wrong," he defended.

"Like you always tell me I'm wrong?" she shot back.

Lee's eyes narrowed. "_You're _the one who called yourself a screw-up."

"That's because I am." Her eyes flashed angrily. "But friends are supposed to be supportive when you screw up - help you fix things, not condemn you."

"When have I ever done that?" Lee demanded, hands on his hips.

The numerous occasions flashed through Kara's mind. "When have you ever ...?" She stopped and laughed harshly. "That's rich Lee Adama, even for you. People have always made jokes about your callsign, but I think maybe it's exactly the right one for you. You _do _think you're a god - sitting high up on your pedestal looking down on us mere mortals disdainfully as we screw up." Her eyes narrowed to slits. "Well I hate to burst your bubble, but you're not perfect!"

"I know that!" he yelled back.

"Then why do you act like you are?" she demanded.

"I ..." he began hotly, then a series of memories flashed through his mind - refusing to shake hands with the Chief when he'd first come aboard Galactica, getting defensive and putting Kara down when she didn't seem to believe he could destroy the cylons tylium factory, yelling at Kara for sleeping with Baltar when he himself had no claim on her ... they went on and on. The anger deflated out of him suddenly and he remembered why he was here. To apologize and make things right, not to let things escalate into hatred like they always did.

"I'm sorry," he finished, sighing sadly.

Kara blinked and did a double-take. "I beg your pardon?"

"I'm sorry," he said contritely. "You're right, I have been awful. Egotistical, condescending, and just plain mean. Especially to you. I'm sorry I hurt you - it was never what I intended."

The anger faded from her face and she stood quietly, seeming to take up less space than when she was mad. Her hands twisted themselves together in front of her.

"What _did _you intend then?" she asked softly, eyes rising to meet his.

He sighed. "I don't know. I never wanted things to be like this between us, and I just don't know how they got this way." He took a deep breath. "Somehow you always manage to bring out the worst in me."

She smirked slightly - almost imperceptibly, but Lee caught it.

"Except when we're flying," she teased.

"Except when we're flying." He nodded, smiling slightly. Then sadness replaced it once again. "It's too bad we don't do that anymore. I miss it," he whispered.

"Me too," she whispered back, and their stare held ... and held ... and then ...

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but you _are _the Commander of this ship right?"

"Right," he said slowly, wondering where she was going with this.

"Can you not sign out a ship for _yourself _once in a while?" She shrugged. "I've got some free time ..."

Lee broke into a big grin and Kara couldn't help but match it. It was just too infectious. His smile was one of the things she'd always loved about him, and something she'd really missed seeing lately.

He came around the table and stood before her, not touching, looking deeply into her gleaming eyes.

"Are we ... are we okay?" he asked tentatively, suddenly remembering as he said the words the time Kara had asked him the very same question. He really hoped she didn't answer the way he had.

She reached out a hand, eyes still locked with his. He took it and felt her squeeze gently, thumb caressing the top of his hand.

"No, we're not okay. But we will be."

_The End_


End file.
